A wedding is the ceremony in which two people are united in marriage or a similar institution. Wedding traditions and customs vary greatly between cultures, ethnic groups, religions, countries, and social classes. Most wedding ceremonies involve an exchange of wedding vows by the couple, presentation of a gift (offering, ring(s), symbolic item, flowers, money), and a public proclamation of marriage by an authority figure or leader. Special wedding garments are often worn, and the ceremony is followed by a wedding reception. Music, poetry, prayers or readings from Scripture or literature also may be incorporated into the ceremony.
Common elements across cultures
A number of cultures have adopted the traditional Western custom of the white wedding, in which a bride wears a white dress and veil. This tradition was popularized through the wedding of Queen Victoria. Some say Victoria's choice of a white gown may have simply been a sign of extravagance, but may have also been influenced by the values she held which emphasized sexual purity. Within the modern 'white wedding' tradition, a white dress and veil are unusual choices for a woman's second or subsequent wedding. The notion that a white gown might symbolize sexual purity has been long abandoned, and is criticized by etiquette writers like Judith Martin as distasteful.
The use of a wedding ring has long been part of religious weddings in Europe and America, but the origin of the tradition is unclear. Historians like Vicky Howard, point out that belief in the "ancient" quality of the practice are most likely a modern invention. "Double ring" ceremonies are also a modern practice, a groom's wedding band not appearing in the United States until the early 20th Century.
The wedding is often followed by a reception in which the rituals may include toasting the newlyweds, their first dance as spouses, and the cutting of a wedding cake.
Traditional wedding garb
- Cheongsam or Hanfu, Chinese traditional formal wear.
- Batik and Kebaya, a garment worn by the Javanese people of Indonesia and also by the Malay people of Malaysia.
- Barong Tagalog, an embroidered, formal men's garment of the Philippines.
- Kimono, the traditional garments of Japan
- Sari, Indian popular and traditional dress in India
- Dhoti, male garment in South India
- Dashiki, the traditional West African wedding attire
- Áo Dài, traditional garments of Vietnam
- Morning dress, western daytime formal dress
- Kilt, male garment particular to Scottish culture
- Kittel, a white robe worn by the groom at an Orthodox Jewish wedding. The kittel is worn only under the Chupah, and is removed before the reception.
- Topor, a type of conical headgear
- Evening Suits
- Black tie ("dinner jacket" in the UK; often referred to as a "Tuxedo" in the US; traditionally appropriate only for use after 6:00 p.m., but also seen in daytime, especially in the United States)
- Non-traditional "tuxedo" variants (colored jackets/ties, "wedding suits")
- White tie ("evening dress" in the UK; very formal evening attire)
- Sherwani, a long coat-like garment worn in South Asia
- Wedding crown, worn by Scandinavian brides
- Wedding veil
- Wedding dress
- Langa Oni, traditional two piece garment worn by unmarried Telugu Hindu women.
Wedding music
Main article: Wedding musicWestern weddings
Music played at Western weddings includes a processional song for walking down the aisle (ex: wedding march) and reception dance music includes:
- Various works for trumpet and organ, arguably the most famous of which include the Prince of Denmark's March by Jeremiah Clarke as a processional, the "Trumpet Tune" by Henry Purcell and the "Trumpet Voluntary" by John Stanley as recessionals.
- Selections by George Frideric Handel, perhaps most notably the "Air" from his Water Music as processional and the "Alla Hornpipe" as recessional.
- The "Bridal Chorus" from Lohengrin by Richard Wagner, often used as the processional and commonly known as "Here Comes the Bride". Richard Wagner is said to have been anti-Semitic, and as a result, the Bridal Chorus is often not used at Jewish weddings.
- Johann Pachelbel's Canon in D is an alternative processional.
- The "Wedding March" from Felix Mendelssohn's incidental music for the Shakespeare play, A Midsummer Night's Dream , used as a recessional.
- The "Toccata" from Charles-Marie Widor's Symphony for Organ No. 5 , used as a recessional.
- Segments of the Ode to Joy, the fourth movement of Ludwig van Beethoven's Ninth Symphony.
- At wedding receptions, Der Ententanz , a 1950s Swiss Oom-pah song known more commonly in America as The Chicken Dance , has become a popular part of the reception dance music.
- "At Last" by Etta James is often chosen as the first song for the bride and groom to dance to.
Jewish weddings
At traditional Jewish weddings, a solemn, wordless tune is sung as the groom and then bride walk down the aisles.
Wedding customs around the world
African customs
Ethiopia
The Wedding procedure starts with the groom's side sending a representative who requests the marriage between the parties. Then an appointment is given and a verdict on the marriage is given. Before the wedding the Dowry (ጧሎሽ) is given as agreed. On the wedding day the groom and three or four "bestmen" (ሚዜ) go to the wife's house. At the house the wife's family and friends ceremonially block the entrance to the house. The associates must sing strongly and force their way into the house. The first bestman holds perfume and sprays everywhere inside the house.
Nigeria
In Nigeria, in west Africa, a husband never uses his wife’s name. Only relatives and the women's own children are allowed to use the name her father gave her and it is only unmarried girls who may be called by name. So to learn a married woman’s name, one has to ask her husband the name of her father, and use that. When a couple are about to get married in this community people sing to inform that the bride is bound and is brought to the young man. Singing and dancing are two very important fragments in the Nigerian weddings and they are always combined with a big feast. The bride is kept in a special hut where she stays till he is let inside.
Pygmy wedding traditions
Pygmy engagements were not long and usually formalized by an exchange of visits between the families concerned. The groom to be would bring a gift of game or maybe a few arrows to his new in-laws, take his bride home to live in his band and with his new parents. His only obligation is to find among his relatives a girl willing to marry a brother or male cousin of his wife. If he feels he can feed more than one wife, he may have additional wives.
Arab wedding customs
Main article: Arabic weddingAlthough Christian weddings in the Arab World bear similarities to Western weddings, Muslim weddings in the Arab countries are influenced by Muslim traditions. Muslim weddings start with a Sheikh and Al-kitaab (book) for the bride and groom. A wedding is not Islamically valid unless both bride and groom are willing, and the groom is often encouraged to visit her before the wedding (as advised in many aḥadīth of the Islamic prophet Muhammad). However, these visits must be chaperoned to ensure purity of action between the two. Men and women in wedding ceremonies and receptions are segregated, with areas for men and for women.
Bengali wedding customs
Main article: Bengali weddingBengali wedding refers to both Muslim and Hindu weddings in Bangladesh and West Bengal. Although Muslim and Hindu marriages have their distinctive religious rituals, there are many common cultural rituals in marriages across religion among Bengali people.
Chinese wedding customs
Main article: Chinese marriageTraditional Chinese marriage is a ceremonial ritual within Chinese societies that involve a marriage established by pre-arrangement between families. Within Chinese culture, romantic love was allowed, and monogamy was the norm for most ordinary citizens. A band of musicians with gongs and flute-like instruments accompanies the bride parade to groom's home. Similar music is also played at the wedding banquet. Depending on the region that the bride hails from, Chinese weddings will have different traditions such as Tea Ceremony or the use of a wedding emcee. Also in modern times, Chinese couples will often go to photo studios to take "glamour shots" posing in multiple gowns and various backgroun
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